I wish that real feelings were easy to tell people...or at least show them. It seems like you can joke about something all you want, but when you do eventually feel that way, it becomes the most difficult thing to deal with. Admitting it to yourself is hard; admitting it to others is even worse. Admitting it to the right person, though, is putting everything on the line with a scarily real chance of being rejected by the one person you never thought you'd fall for--the one person who has the ability to break you in a completely different way than you've ever been broken before. So, what do you do? You laugh it off, joke about it, and continue to have that "What if?" in your mind. Or, you march right up to him and say what is on your mind, taking that chance and putting yourself out there. But that takes a courage I can only dream of. I'm not fearless.
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